Extract from the Chapter "On Greenhow Hill"
from "Life’s Handicap" by Rudyard Kipling
....It’s along o’ yon hill there,’
said Learoyd, watching the bare sub-Himalayan spur that reminded him of
his Yorkshire moors. He was speaking more to himself than his fellows.
‘Ay,’ said he, ‘Rumbolds Moor stands up ower Skipton town, an’ Greenhow
Hill stands up ower Pately Brig. I reckon you’ve never heeard tell o’ Green-how
Hill, but yon bit o’ bare stuff if there was nobbut a white road windin’
is like ut; strangely like. Moors an’ moors an’ moors, wi’ never a tree
for shelter, an’ gray houses wi’ flagstone rooves, and pewits cryin’, an’
a windhover goin’ to and fro just like these kites. And cold! A wind that
cuts you like a knife. You could tell Green-how Hill folk by the red-apple
colour o’ their cheeks an’ nose tips, and their blue eyes, driven into
pin-points by the wind. Miners mostly, burrowin’ for lead i’ th’ hillsides,
followin’ the trail of th’ ore vein same as a field-rat. It was the roughest
minin’ I ever seen. Yo’d come on a bit o’ creakin’ wood windlass like a
well-head, an’ you was let down i’ th’ bight of a rope, fendin’ yoursen
off the side wi’ one hand, carryin’ a candle stuck in a lump o’ clay with
t’other, an’ clickin’ hold of a rope with t’other hand.’
‘An’ that’s three of them,’ said Mulvaney.
‘Must be a good climate in those parts.’
Learoyd took no heed.
‘An’ then yo’ came to a level, where you
crept on your hands and knees through a mile o’ windin’ drift, an’ you
come out into a cave-place as big as Leeds Townhall, with a engine pumpin’
water from workin’s ’at went deeper still. It’s a queer country, let alone
minin’, for the hill is full of those natural caves, an’ the rivers an’
the becks drops into what they call pot-holes, an’ come out again miles
away.’
‘Wot was you doin’ there?’ said Ortheris.
‘I was a young chap then, an’ mostly went
wi’ ’osses, leadin’ coal and lead ore; but at th’ time I’m tellin’ on I
was drivin’ the waggon-team i’ th’ big sumph. I didn’t belong to that country-side
by rights. I went there because of a little difference at home, an’ at
fust I took up wi’ a rough lot. One night we’d been drinkin’, an’ I must
ha’ hed more than I could stand, or happen th’ ale was none so good. Though
i’ them days, By for God, I never seed bad ale.’ He flung his arms over
his head, and gripped a vast handful of white violets. ‘Nah,’ said he,
‘I never seed the ale I could not drink, the bacca I could not smoke, nor
the lass I could not kiss. Well, we mun have a race home, the lot on us.
I lost all th’ others, an’ when I was climbin’ ower one of them walls built
o’ loose stones, I comes down into the ditch, stones and all, an’ broke
my arm. Not as I knawed much about it, for I fell on th’ back of my head,
an’ was knocked stupid like. An’ when I come to mysen it were mornin’,
an’ I were lyin’ on the settle i’ Jesse Roantree’s house-place, an’ ’Liza
Roantree was settin’ sewin’. I ached all ovver, and my mouth were like
a lime- kiln. She gave me a drink out of a china mug wi’ gold letters—"A
Present from Leeds"—as I looked at many and many a time at after. "Yo’re
to lie still while Dr. Warbottom comes, because your arm’s broken, and
father has sent a lad to fetch him. He found yo’ when he was goin’ to work,
an’ carried you here on his back," sez she. "Oa!" sez I; an’ I shet my
eyes, for I felt ashamed o’ mysen. "Father’s gone to his work these three
hours, an’ he said he’d tell ’em to get somebody to drive the tram." The
clock ticked, an’ a bee comed in the house, an’ they rung i’ my head like
mill-wheels. An’ she give me another drink an’ settled the pillow. "Eh,
but yo’re young to be getten drunk an’ such like, but yo’ won’t do it again,
will yo’?"—"Noa," sez I, "I wouldn’t if she’d not but stop they mill-wheels
clatterin’." ’
‘Faith, it’s a good thing to be nursed
by a woman when you’re sick!’ said Mulvaney. ‘Dir’ cheap at the price av
twenty broken heads.’
Ortheris turned to frown across the valley.
He had not been nursed by many women in his life.
‘An’ then Dr. Warbottom comes ridin’ up,
an’ Jesse Roantree along with ’im. He was a highlarned doctor, but he talked
wi’ poor folk same as theirsens. "What’s ta bin agaate on naa?" he sings
out. "Brekkin’ tha thick head?" An’ he felt me all ovver. "That’s none
broken. Tha’ nobbut knocked a bit sillier than ordinary, an’ that’s daaft
eneaf." An’ soa he went on, callin’ me all the names he could think on,
but settin’ my arm, wi’ Jesse’s help, as careful as could be. "Yo’ mun
let the big oaf bide here a bit, Jesse," he says, when he hed strapped
me up an’ given me a dose o’ physic; "an’ you an’ ’Liza will tend him,
though he’s scarcelins worth the trouble. An’ tha’ll lose tha work," sez
he, "an’ tha’ll be upon th’ Sick Club for a couple o’ months an’ more.
Doesn’t tha think tha’s a fool?" ’
‘But whin was a young man, high or low,
the other av a fool, I’d like to know?’ said Mulvaney. ‘Sure, folly’s the
only safe way to wisdom, for I’ve thried it.’
‘Wisdom!’ grinned Ortheris, scanning his
comrades with uplifted chin. ‘You’re bloomin’ Solomons, you two, ain’t
you?’
Learoyd went calmly on, with a steady eye
like an ox chewing the cud.
‘And that was how I comed to know ’Liza
Roantree. There’s some tunes as she used to sing—aw, she were always singin’—that
fetches Green-how Hill before my eyes as fair as you brow across there.
And she would learn me to sing bass, an’ I was to go to th’ chapel wi’
’em, where Jesse and she led the singin’, th’ old man playin’ the fiddle.
He was a strange chap, old Jesse, fair mad wi’ music, an’ he made me promise
to learn the big fiddle when my arm was better. It belonged to him, and
it stood up in a big case alongside o’ th’ eight-day clock, but Willie
Satterthwaite, as played it in the chapel, had getten deaf as a door-post,
and it vexed Jesse, as he had to rap him ower his head wi’ th’ fiddle-stick
to make him give ower sawin’ at th’ right time.
‘But there was a black drop in it all,
an’ it was a man in a black coat that brought it. When th’ Primitive Methodist
preacher came to Greenhow, he would always stop wi’ Jesse Roantree, an’
he laid hold of me from th’ beginning. It seemed I wor a soul to be saved,
and he meaned to do it. At th’ same time I jealoused ’at he were keen o’
savin’ ’Liza Roantree’s soul as well, and I could ha’ killed him many a
time. An’ this went on till one day I broke out, an’ borrowed th’ brass
for a drink from ’Liza. After fower days I come back, wi’ my tail between
my legs, just to see ’Liza again. But Jesse were at home an’ th’ preacher—th’
Reverend Amos Barraclough. ’Liza said naught, but a bit o’ red come into
her face as were white of a regular thing. Says Jesse, tryin’ his best
to be civil, "Nay, lad, it’s like this. You’ve getten to choose which way
it’s goin’ to be. I’ll ha’ nobody across ma doorstep as goes a-drinkin’,
an’ borrows my lass’s money to spend i’ their drink. Ho’d tha tongue, ’Liza,"
sez he, when she wanted to put in a word ’at I were welcome to th’ brass,
and she were none afraid that I wouldn’t pay it back. Then the Reverend
cuts in, seein’ as Jesse were losin’ his temper, an’ they fair beat me
among them. But it were ’Liza, as looked an’ said naught, as did more than
either o’ their tongues, an’ soa I concluded to get converted.’
‘Fwhat!’ shouted Mulvaney. Then, checking
himself, he said softly, ‘Let be! Let be! Sure the Blessed Virgin is the
mother of all religion an’ most women; an’ there’s a dale av piety in a
girl if the men would only let ut stay there. I’d ha’ been converted myself
under the circumstances.’
‘Nay, but,’ pursued Learoyd with a blush,
‘I meaned it.’
Ortheris laughed as loudly as he dared,
having regard to his business at the time.
‘Ay, Ortheris, you may laugh, but you didn’t
know you preacher Barraclough—a little white-faced chap, wi’ a voice as
’ud wile a bird off an a bush, and a way o’ layin’ hold of folks as made
them think they’d never had a live man for a friend before. You never saw
him, an’—an’—you never seed ’Liza Roantree—never seed ’Liza Roantree.…Happen
it was as much ’Liza as th’ preacher and her father, but anyways they all
meaned it, an’ I was fair shamed o’ mysen, an’ so I become what they called
a changed charácter. And when I think on, it’s hard to believe as
yon chap going to prayer-meetin’s, chapel, and class-meetin’s were me.
But I never had naught to say for mysen, though there was a deal o’ shoutin’,
and old Sammy Strother, as were almost clemmed to death and doubled up
with the rheumatics, would sing out, "Joyful! Joyful!" and ’at it were
better to go up to heaven in a coal-basket than down to hell i’ a coach
an’ six. And he would put his poor old claw on my shoulder, sayin’, "Doesn’t
tha feel it, tha great lump? Doesn’t tha feel it?" An’ sometimes I thought
I did, and then again I thought I didn’t, an’ how was that?’
‘The iverlastin’ nature av mankind,’ said
Mulvaney. ‘An’, furthermore, I misdoubt you were built for the Primitive
Methodians. They’re a new corps anyways. I hold by the Ould Church, for
she’s the mother of them all—ay, an’ the father, too. I like her bekaze
she’s most remarkable regimental in her fittings. I may die in Honolulu,
Nova Zambra, or Cape Cayenne, but wherever I die, me bein’ fwhat I am,
an’ a priest handy, I go under the same orders an’ the same words an’ the
same unction as tho’ the Pope himself come down from the roof av St. Peter’s
to see me off. There’s neither high nor low, nor broad nor deep, nor betwixt
nor between wid her, an’ that’s what I like. But mark you, she’s no manner
av Church for a wake man, bekaze she takes the body and the soul av him,
onless he has his proper work to do. I remember when my father died that
was three months comin’ to his grave; begad he’d ha’ sold the shebeen above
our heads for ten minutes’ quittance of purgathory. An’ he did all he could.
That’s why I say ut takes a strong man to deal with the Ould Church, an’
for that reason you’ll find so many women go there. An’ that sames a conundrum.’
‘Wot’s the use o’ worrittin’ ’bout these
things?’ said Ortheris. ‘You’re bound to find all out quicker nor you want
to, any’ow.’ He jerked the cartridge out of the breech-block into the palm
of his hand. ‘’Ere’s my chaplain,’ he said, and made the venomous black-headed
bullet bow like a marionette. ‘’E’s goin’ to teach a man all about which
is which, an’ wot’s true, after all, before sundown. But wot ’appened after
that, Jock?’
‘There was one thing they boggled at, and
almost shut th’ gate i’ my face for, and that were my dog Blast, th’ only
one saved out o’ a litter o’ pups as was blowed up when a keg o’ minin’
powder loosed off in th’ store-keeper’s hut. They liked his name no better
than his business, which were fightin’ every dog he comed across; a rare
good dog, wi’ spots o’ black and pink on his face, one ear gone, and lame
o’ one side wi’ being driven in a basket through an iron roof, a matter
of half a mile.
‘They said I mun give him up ’cause he
were worldly and low; and would I let mysen be shut out of heaven for the
sake on a dog? "Nay," says I, "if th’ door isn’t wide enough for th’ pair
on us, we’ll stop outside, for we’ll none be parted." And th’ preacher
spoke up for Blast, as had a likin’ for him from th’ first—I reckon that
was why I come to like th’ preacher—and wouldn’t hear o’ changin’ his name
to Bless, as some o’ them wanted. So th’ pair on us became reg’lar chapel-members.
But it’s hard for a young chap o’ my build to cut traces from the world,
th’ flesh, an’ the devil all uv a heap. Yet I stuck to it for a long time,
while th’ lads as used to stand about th’ town-end an’ lean ower th’ bridge,
spittin’ into th’ beck o’ a Sunday, would call after me, "Sitha, Learoyd,
when’s ta bean to preach, ’cause we’re comin’ to hear tha."—"Ho’d tha jaw.
He hasn’t getten th’ white choaker on ta morn," another lad would say,
and I had to double my fists hard i’ th’ bottom of my Sunday coat, and
say to mysen, "If ’twere Monday and I warn’t a member o’ the Primitive
Methodists, I’d leather all th’ lot of yond’." That was th’ hardest of
all—to know that I could fight and I mustn’t fight.’
Sympathetic grunts from Mulvaney.
‘So what wi’ singin’, practisin’, and classmeetin’s,
and th’ big fiddle, as he made me take between my knees, I spent a deal
o’ time i’ Jesse Roantree’s house-place. But often as I was there, th’
preacher fared to me to go oftener, and both th’ old man an’ th’ young
woman were pleased to have him. He lived i’ Pately Brig, as were a goodish
step off, but he come. He come all the same. I liked him as well or better
as any man I’d ever seen i’ one way, and yet I hated him wi’ all my heart
i’ t’other, and we watched each other like cat and mouse, but civil as
you please, for I was on my best behaviour, and he was that fair and open
that I was bound to be fair with him. Rare good company he was, if I hadn’t
wanted to wring his cliver little neck half of the time. Often and often
when he was goin’ from Jesse’s I’d set him a bit on the road.’
‘See ’im ’ome, you mean?’ said Ortheris.
‘Ay. It’s a way we have i’ Yorkshire o’
seein’ friends off. Yon was a friend as I didn’t want to come back, and
he didn’t want me to come back neither, and so we’d walk together towards
Pately, and then he’d set me back again, and there we’d be wal two o’clock
i’ the mornin’ settin’ each other to an’ fro like a blasted pair o’ pendulums
twixt hill and valley, long after th’ light had gone out i’ ’Liza’s window,
as both on us had been looking at, pretending to watch the moon.’
‘Ah!’ broke in Mulvaney, ‘ye’d no chanst
against the maraudin’ psalm-singer. They’ll take the airs an’ the graces
instid av the man nine times out av ten, an’ they only find the blunder
later—the wimmen.’
‘That’s just where yo’re wrong,’ said Learoyd,
reddening under the freckled tan of his cheeks. ‘I was th’ first wi ’Liza,
an’ yo’d think that were enough. But th’ parson were a steady-gaited sort
o’ chap, and Jesse were strong o’ his side, and all th’ women i’ the congregation
dinned it to ’Liza ’at she were fair fond to take up wi’ a wastrel ne’er-do-weel
like me, as was scarcelins respectable an’ a fighting dog at his heels.
It was all very well for her to be doing me good and saving my soul, but
she must mind as she didn’t do herself harm. They talk o’ rich folk bein’
stuck up an’ genteel, but for cast-iron pride o’ respectability there’s
naught like poor chapel folk. It’s as cold as th’ wind o’ Greenhow Hill—ay,
and colder, for ’twill never change. And now I come to think on it, one
at strangest things I know is ’at they couldn’t abide th’ thought o’ soldiering.
There’s a vast o’ fightin’ i’ th’ Bible, and there’s a deal of Methodists
i’ th’ army; but to hear chapel folk talk yo’d think that soldierin’ were
next door, an’ t’other side, to hangin’. I’ their meetin’s all their talk
is o’ fightin’. When Sammy Strother were stuck for summat to say in his
prayers, he’d sing out, "Th’ sword o’ th’ Lord and o’ Gideon." They were
allus at it about puttin’ on th’ whole armour o’ righteousness, an’ fightin’
the good fight o’ faith. And then, atop o’ ’t all, they held a prayer-meetin’
ower a young chap as wanted to ’list, and nearly deafened him, till he
picked up his hat and fair ran away. And they’d tell tales in th’ Sunday-school
o’ bad lads as had been thumped and brayed for bird-nesting o’ Sundays
and playin’ truant o’ week-days, and how they took to wrestlin’, dog-fightin’,
rabbit-runnin’, and drinkin’, till at last, as if ’twere a hepitaph on
a gravestone, they damned him across th’ moors wi’, "an’ then he went and
’listed for a soldier," an’ they’d all fetch a deep breath, and throw up
their eyes like a hen drinkin’.’
‘Fwhy is ut?’ said Mulvaney, bringing down
his hand on his thigh with a crack. ‘In the name av God, fwhy is ut? I’ve
seen ut, tu. They cheat an’ they swindle an’ they lie an’ they slander,
an’ fifty things fifty times worse; but the last an’ the worst by their
reckonin’ is to serve the Widdy honest. It’s like the talk av childer—seein’
things all round.’
‘Plucky lot of fightin’ good fights of
whatsername they’d do if we didn’t see they had a quiet place to fight
in. And such fightin’ as theirs is! Cats on the tiles. T’other callin’
to which to come on. I’d give a month’s pay to get some o’ them broad-backed
beggars in London sweatin’ through a day’s road- makin’ an’ a night’s rain.
They’d carry on a deal afterwards—same as we’re supposed to carry on. I’ve
bin turned out of a measly arf-license pub down Lambeth way, full o’ greasy
kebmen, ’fore now,’ said Ortheris with an oath.
‘Maybe you were dhrunk,’ said Mulvaney
soothingly.
‘Worse nor that. The Forders were drunk.
I
was wearin’ the Queen’s uniform.’
‘I’d no particular thought to be a soldier
i’ them days,’ said Learoyd, still keeping his eye on the bare hill opposite,
‘but this sort o’ talk put it i’ my head. They was so good, th’ chapel
folk, that they tumbled ower t’other side. But I stuck to it for ’Liza’s
sake, specially as she was learning me to sing the bass part in a horotorio
as Jesse were gettin’ up. She sung like a throstle hersen, and we had practisin’s
night after night for a matter of three months.’
‘I know what a horotorio is,’ said Ortheris
pertly. ‘It’s a sort of chaplain’s sing-song—words all out of the Bible,
and hullabaloojah choruses.’
‘Most
Greenhow Hill folks played some instrument or t’other, an’ they all
sung so you might have heard them miles away, and they were so pleased
wi’ the noise they made they didn’t fair to want anybody to listen. The
preacher sung high seconds when he wasn’t playin’ the flute, an’ they set
me, as hadn’t got far with big fiddle, again Willie Satterthwaite, to jog
his elbow when he had to get a’ gate playin.’ Old Jesse was happy if ever
a man was, for he were th’ conductor an’ th’ first fiddle an’ th’ leadin’
singer, beatin’ time wi’ his fiddle-stick, till at times he’d rap with
it on the table, and cry out, "Now, you mun all stop; it’s my turn." And
he’d face round to his front, fair sweating wi’ pride, to sing th’ tenor
solos. But he were grandest i’ th’ choruses, waggin’ his head, flinging
his arms round like a windmill, and singin’ hisself black in the face.
A rare singer were Jesse.
‘Yo’ see, I was not o’ much account wi’
’em all exceptin’ to ’Liza Roantree, and I had a deal o’ time settin’ quiet
at meetings and horotorio practises to hearken their talk, and if it were
strange to me at beginnin’, it got stranger still at after, when I was
shut on it, and could study what it meaned.
‘Just after th’ horotorios came off, ’Liza,
as had allus been weakly like, was took very bad. I walked Dr. Warbottom’s
horse up and down a deal of times while he were inside, where they wouldn’t
let me go, though I fair ached to see her.
‘ "She’ll be better i’ noo, lad—better
i’ noo," he used to say. "That mun ha’ patience." Then they said if I was
quiet I might go in, and th’ Reverend Amos Barraclough used to read to
her lyin’ propped up among th’ pillows. Then she began to mend a bit, and
they let me carry her on to th’ settle, and when it got warm again she
went about same as afore. Th’ preacher and me and Blast was a deal together
i’ them days, and i’ one way we was rare good comrades. But I could ha’
stretched him time and again with a good will. I mind one day he said he
would like to go down into th’ bowels o’ th’ earth, and see how th’ Lord
had builded th’ framework o’ th’ everlastin’ hills. He were one of them
chaps as had a gift o’ sayin’ things. They rolled off the tip of his clever
tongue, same as Mulvaney here, as would ha’ made a rare good preacher if
he had nobbut given his mind to it. I lent him a suit o’ miner’s kit as
almost buried th’ little man, and his white face down i’ th’ coat-collar
and hat-flap looked like the face of a boggart, and he cowered down i’
th’ bottom o’ the waggon. I was drivin’ a tram as led up a bit of an incline
up to th’ cave where the engine was pumpin’, and where th’ ore was brought
up and put into th’ waggons as went down o’ themselves, me puttin’ th’
brake on and th’ horses a-trottin’ after. Long as it was daylight we were
good friends, but when we got fair into th’ dark, and could nobbut see
th’ day shinin’ at the hole like a lamp at a street-end, I feeled down-right
wicked. Ma religion dropped all away from me when I looked back at him
as were always comin’ between me and ’Liza. The talk was ’at they were
to be wed when she got better, an’ I couldn’t get her to say yes or nay
to it. He began to sing a hymn in his thin voice, and I came out wi’ a
chorus that was all cussin’ an’ swearin’ at my horses, an’ I began to know
how I hated him. He were such a little chap, too. I could drop him wi’
one hand down Garstang’s Copper-hole—a place where th’ beck slithered ower
th’ edge on a rock, and fell wi’ a bit of a whisper into a pit as no rope
i’ Greenhow could plump.’
Again Learoyd rooted up the innocent violets.
‘Ay, he should see th’ bowels o’ th’ earth an’ never naught else. I could
take him a mile or two along th’ drift, and leave him wi’ his candle doused
to cry hallelujah, wi’ none to hear him and say amen. I was to lead him
down th’ ladder-way to th’ drift where Jesse Roantree was workin’, and
why shouldn’t he slip on th’ ladder, wi’ my feet on his fingers till they
loosed grip, and I put him down wi’ my heel? If I went fust down th’ ladder
I could click hold on him and chuck him over my head, so as he should go
squshin’ down the shaft, breakin’ his bones at ev’ry timberin’ as Bill
Appleton did when he was fresh, and hadn’t a bone left when he wrought
to th’ bottom. Niver a blasted leg to walk from Pately. Niver an arm to
put round ’Liza Roantree’s waist. Niver no more—niver no more.’
The thick lips curled back over the yellow
teeth, and that flushed face was not pretty to look upon. Mulvaney nodded
sympathy, and Ortheris, moved by his comrade’s passion, brought up the
rifle to his shoulder, and searched the hillside for his quarry, muttering
ribaldry about a sparrow, a spout, and a thunder- storm. The voice of the
watercourse supplied the necessary small talk till Learoyd picked up his
story.
‘But it’s none so easy to kill a man like
yon. When I’d given up my horses to th’ lad as took my place and I was
showin’ th’ preacher th’ workin’s, shoutin’ into his ear across th’ clang
o’ th’ pumpin’ engines, I saw he were afraid o’ naught; and when the lamplight
showed his black eyes, I could feel as he was masterin’ me again. I were
no better nor Blast chained up short and growlin’ i’ the depths of him
while a strange dog went safe past.
‘ "Th’ art a coward and a fool," I said
to mysen; an’ I wrestled i’ my mind again’ him till, when we come to Garstang’s
Copper-hole, I laid hold o’ the preacher and lifted him up over my head
and held him into the darkest on it. "Now, lad," I says, "it’s to be one
or t’other on us—thee or me—for ’Liza Roantree. Why, isn’t thee afraid
for thysen?" I says, for he were still i’ my arms as a sack. "Nay; I’m
but afraid for thee, my poor lad, as knows naught," says he. I set him
down on th’ edge, an’ th’ beck run stiller, an’ there was no more buzzin’
in my head like when th’ bee come through th’ window o’ Jesse’s house.
"What dost tha mean?" says I.
‘ "I’ve often thought as thou ought to
know," says he, "but ’twas hard to tell thee. ’Liza Roantree’s for neither
on us, nor for nobody o’ this earth. Dr. Warbottom says—and he knows her,
and her mother before her—that she is in a decline, and she cannot live
six months longer. He’s known it for many a day. Steady, John! Steady!"
says he. And that weak little man pulled me further back and set me again’
him, and talked it all over quiet and still, me turnin’ a bunch o’ candles
in my hand, and counting them ower and ower again as I listened. A deal
on it were th’ regular preachin’ talk, but there were a vast lot as made
me begin to think as he were more of a man than I’d ever given him credit
for, till I were cut as deep for him as I were for mysen.
‘Six candles we had, and we crawled and
climbed all that day while they lasted, and I said to mysen, "’Liza Roantree
hasn’t six months to live." And when we came into th’ daylight again we
were liked dead men to look at, an’ Blast come behind us without so much
as waggin’ his tail. When I saw ’Liza again she looked at me a minute and
says, "Who’s telled tha? For I see that knows." And she tried to smile
as she kissed me, and I fair broke down.
‘Yo’see, I was a young chap i’ them days,
and had seen naught o’ life, let alone death, as is allus a- waitin’. She
telled me as Dr. Warbottom said as Greenhow air was too keen, and they
were goin’ to Bradford, to Jesse’s brother David, as worked i’ a mill,
and I mun hold up like a man and a Christian, and she’d pray for me. Well,
and they went away, and the preacher that same back end o’ th’ year were
appointed to another circuit, as they call it, and I were left alone on
Greenhow Hill.
‘I tried, and I tried hard, to stick to
th’ chapel, but ’tweren’t th’ same thing at after. I hadn’t Liza’s voice
to follow i’ th’ singin’, nor her eyes a’shinin’ acrost their heads. And
i’ th’ class-meetings they said as I mun have some experiences to tell,
and I hadn’t a word to say for mysen.
‘Blast and me moped a good deal, and happen
we didn’t behave ourselves over well, for they dropped us and wondered
however they’d come to take us up. I can’t tell how we got through th’
time, while i’ th’ winter I gave up my job and went to Bradford. Old Jesse
were at th’ door o’ th’ house, in a long street o’ little houses. He’d
been sendin’ th’ children ’way as were clatterin’ their clogs in th’ causeway,
for she were asleep.
"‘Is it thee?" he says; "but you’re not
to see her. I’ll none have her wakened for a nowt like thee. She’s goin’
fast, and she mun go in peace. Thou’lt never be good for naught i’ th’
world, and as long as thou lives thou’ll never play the big fiddle. Get
away, lad, get away!" So he shut the door softly i’ my face.
‘Nobody never made Jesse my master, but
it seemed to me he was about right, and I went away into the town and knocked
up against a recruiting sergeant. The old tales o’ th’ chapel folk came
buzzin’ into my head. I was to get away, and this were th’ regular road
for the likes o’ me. I ’listed there and then, took th’ Widow’s shillin’,
and had a bunch o’ ribbons pinned i’ my hat.
‘But next day I found my way to David Roantree’s
door, and Jesse came to open it. Says he, "Thou’s come back again wi’ th’
devil’s colours flyin’—thy true colours, as I always telled thee."
‘But I begged and prayed of him to let
me see her nobbut to say good-bye, till a woman calls down th’ stair-way,
"She says John Learoyd’s to come up." Th’ old man shifts aside in a flash,
and lays his hand on my arm, quite gentle like. "But thou’lt be quiet,
John," says he, "for she’s rare and weak. Thou was allus a good lad."
‘Her eyes were all alive wi’ light, and
her hair was thick on the pillow round her, but her cheeks were thin—thin
to frighten a man that’s strong. "Nay, father, yo mayn’t say th’ devil’s
colours. Them ribbons is pretty." An’ she held out her hands for th’ hat,
an’ she put all straight as a woman will wi’ ribbons. "Nay, but what they’re
pretty," she says. "Eh, but I’d ha’ liked to see thee i’ thy red coat,
John, for thou was allus my own lad—my very own lad, and none else."
‘She lifted up her arms, and they come
round my neck i’ a gentle grip, and they slacked away, and she seemed fainting.
"Now yo’ mun get away, lad," says Jesse, and I picked up my hat and I came
downstairs.
‘Th’ recruiting sergeant were waitin’ for
me at th’ corner public-house. "Yo’ve seen your sweetheart?" says he. "Yes,
I’ve seen her," says I. "Well, we’ll have a quart now, and you’ll do your
best to forget her," says he, bein’ one o’ them smart, bustlin’ chaps.
"Ay, sergeant," says I. "Forget her." And I’ve been forgettin’ her ever
since.
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